What does a man have to do to seduce a woman? Much has been said about what the man should do with (or to) the woman. What to wear. Where to go. What pickup lines to pitch. How to fake sincerity. Whether to give candy and flowers or not. How to get to first base, second base, around third, and come in for the homer. Call the next day. And hope to get lucky again.
Little has been said about the importance of other men in this process. Not as competition but as male companions.
Here’s a secret magic tip, guys. Memorize it. Ready? Women like men who have good relationships with other men.
They like men who are confident around other men. They like men who have steadfast male friends. They like men who understand other men and are respected by them.
Don’t believe me? What is attractive about sports stars? Sure they are young, healthy, and handsome. That helps attract the ladies. But they are also team players. They get in there and mix it up with the other guys.
Ever seen The Sopranos? What is attractive about Tony Soprano? Not his flabby physique. Not his ninth grade education. Not his unenlightened view of women. The most notable feature of Tony and other mobsters on the screen is that they spend most of their time in close contact with other men.
The same is true of other “bad boys” from Hollywood cowboys to motorcycle gang members to prison inmates. And equally true of the “good guys” from police officers to soldiers. They’re all “men’s men”.
Look at any book on the romance shelves in your local bookstore. Invariably, the desirable man who wins the woman in the end has close male friends.
There are good biological reason for this. Women take comfort from the shield of protection that a respected man automatically provides. Even at the most civilized cocktail party, most women are not keen on being hit on by every man in the room. If she has a man who is respected by other men, she’s less likely to be pestered by a horde of horny losers.
As well, a man who knows how to cooperate with other men is likely to be a good provider. From participating in a successful mammoth hunt to ruling the boardroom, men who work well in groups will bring home more bacon than men who can’t.
As well, a man who is well-socialized will be a better father. He will provide a better role model for his sons and a better example of a good mate for his daughters.
S0, guys, if you want to woo the ladies, start by paying attention to the guys around you. Don’t start practicing your pickup lines in front of the mirror until you have your male relationships under control.
Then, after you tell a woman that “I must be Long John Silver because I want your booty” and she doesn’t even smile before she turns her back on you, you’ll still be able to go back to your table and share a pitcher with the guys.